Although I am not really back to work until September, I'm officially back for the last day of school (without students) on June 28th. And I should spend August both setting up my new class and gradually weaning myself away - but I'm not making any promises. Right now I'm stuck on what to say when asked if I'm ready to go back to work. I'm stuck because I like to focus on the positive in situations I can't change, and I can't think of anything positive to say. Why would I want to go back to work? To spend time teaching (and learning from) children? Like a home daycare? To hang out in the positive atmosphere of an elementary school with a variety of like-minded adults? Like a daily playgroup? Yes I love my job and the wonderful people I work with, the trouble is I am already doing it, and with the people I love most in the world at my side. I get all the fulfillment I need, and the only reason for working is financial, but even then - our lifestyle won't be changing, just the fact that we will no longer be incurring debt. It's not like my going back to work will give us more money to spend, so there's not even that to look forward to. About the best I can think of to say is that I expect, with a lot of effort and support, I may not slide into a clinical depression. Which is not really what people, especially co-workers, want to hear when they ask, "So, are you looking forward to going back to work?"
So if you don't mind, I will stay in denial just a little longer, and I will try to write more little posts about our life that show why it is harder every day to leave.
9 months ago