Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Advice for adopting (twins) from Vietnam

If I could do it again...
I would bring this double jogging stroller with me.

I wouldn't pack so much baby clothes and toys; you can buy everything there, for less than second-hand here.

I would bring two extra family members with us, more if possible.

I would take more photos. Ha ha just kidding. I'm not even sure that's possible.

I would be more prepared for the extreme jet lag that 5% of us experience, and less worried about the plane rides, which are blissfully brief in retrospect.

If I could do it again...
I would.

But I would miss my husband.

Treasure every moment. Celebrate everything right from the first hint of maybe a referral. If something goes wrong you will survive, but if everything works out (most likely) you will never have that time back.

Don't be afraid of your doubts. You don't have to be perfect. It's the range of our emotions which makes us human, not the ability to always be positive about everything. If things get hard, act "as if" - as if you know what you're doing, as if you're happy, as if your family is healthy and bonded. Eventually you will get there.

Expect the unexpected. I can't stress this one enough. I've read hundreds of adoption stories and they all have one thing in common - at various stages along the process something completely unexpected happened (up to and including after several years home). Our own story is full of surprises, including the most joyous of all - twins.


Francesca said...

okay so why would you bring more family, and how would you deal and prepare for the jetlag!!

Samantha and Woody said...

Two adults per baby - so four adults for twins, preferably family members or people who will continue to be around a lot when you get back.

I don't know that I could do anything about the jetlag, but I would be expecting it, so hopefully better able to deal with it? I found it hard mentally, and that it made me really selfish and snappy (yes, more so than usual, heh), so I guess I would warn friends about that.